Do You Have the Disease to Please?
Let’s get right to it. Do you have the disease to please? Getting a diagnosis is as easy as answering the following four questions.
1. Do you say yes when you really want to say no?
2. Do you apologize often? When you are actually not sorry? When you are angry as a way to diffuse and/or end an argument?
3. Do you avoid confrontation at all costs?
4. Do you put everyone else’s needs above your own?
If you answered yes to any of the above questions, you, my dear, have the disease to please.
A simple mindfulness exercise can be just the prescription!
For the next 48 hours, write down every time you commit any of the above actions. What was the scenario? Why did you respond the way you did? This requires you to not only be very aware of your words and actions but honest about your intentions. If you got into an argument, what was the argument, and were you truly sorry for your behavior or did you just want to get the other person off your back? Did someone ask a favor, what was it, and did you agree to do it because you genuinely wanted to or because you feel guilty saying no?
Are you discovering a pattern to your behavior?
When you do a deed out of guilt or avoid a sticky situation even though it needs to be addressed, you are being inauthentic and dishonest. These qualities cannot exist in truly loving relationships. How can anyone authentically love you if they do not authentically know you?
And you definitely deserve to be authentically loved ❤.
I would love to hear your thoughts, answer your questions, know if this resonates with you, and what the experiment produces.
As always, take care of you.
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Terri Cole – Psychotherapist & Transformation Coach
Terri Cole, founder and CEO of Live Fearless and Free, is a licensed psychotherapist, transformation coach, and an expert at turning fear into freedom. For almost two decades, Terri has empowered celebrities, professional athletes, and individuals alike through television, radio, and other media appearances, speaking engagements, workshops, and a thriving private practice to redesign limiting mental blueprints. Her holistic approach to transformation recognizes the interdependency between a healthy mind and body. Terri’s strategies combine practical psychology, thought innovation, and harnessing the power of intention, to create sustainable change. She has a unique ability to take complex theories and translate them into actionable steps you can implement into your daily life. A cornerstone of Terri’s practice, meditation, was the impetus for her recently released guided mediation CD “Meditation Transformation”. After contributing to Kris Carr’s best-selling Crazy Sexy Cancer book series, Terri is now working on her first solo project, Flip Over and Float, documenting her proven 6-step formula for turning fear into freedom and pain into purpose. In Fall 2012, she will begin hosting a Hay House radio show, giving listeners who are swimming upstream easy tools to flip over and float.